Tuesday, 21 February 2012

Rewarding doesn't mean Easy.

We've been a bit run down round our way lately. Thankfully, kids and hubby seem totally better, but I'm having a harder time shaking whatever this is. I'm going to start prayers to be healed from this cold/ virus, at the start that seemed silly, after a month of coughing, sneezing, and generally feeling rubbish, not so much.

One funny by product of this, is that it's made me focus more on my vocation as wife, mother, and keeper of the home, and it's made me want to be better at it. Maybe it's because doing a little every day seems so much less exhausting than leaving it and doing a huge clean and 12 loads of laundry in one day. Perhaps it because the kids are so much easier when they are entertained and having fun (aren't we all?). Perhaps it's because I want my husband to come home from work, to a clean and relaxing home. I'm not sure what the motivation is, and really, it doesn't matter.

My life is extremely blessed and rewarding, but that doesn't mean it's always easy, or that I don't get exasperated at times. I do.

I'm human.

I suppose that in the past, I've had a slightly naive view of what it means to live out your vocation. I thought it would be pretty easy, and natural, and, to be honest, a bit dull.

How wrong I was.

My life is baffling, relentless, exasperating, mucky, and exhausting.

It's also fun, love-filled, surprising, challenging, and blessed.

Even in my most eye-watering moments, when I desperately need to blow my nose, but first of all have to change the baby boy without him putting his foot in the contents of his nappy, and corral the baby girl before she wanders into a trash bag, I realise I'm blessed.

I truly believe this life is my vocation. It's not always easy, but it's blessed

This lent I aim to focus on living my life as a prayer. I'll ask for some help in the form of  a hymn:

'Lord for tomorrow and it's needs
I do not pray
Keep me o Lord from stain of sin,
Just for today.'

Living out this life, one day, one nappy, one meal, and one blessing at a time.